martes, 20 de mayo de 2014

A lot can happen between now and never

All week I was convinced she'd discovered something terrible about me and changed her mind about me. She had been so friendly up until here. And I liked her. Had I not already met my mate, she would without a doubt be a mistake I would've gladly committed.

The rest of the office seemed to have caught on. Obviously she had told them about me and now they all hated me too. 

The manager was talking to the floor's assistant. I wasn't eavesdropping for once, I had some actual work to do. But my subconscious launched a second process to listen in when Emily's name was spoken.

"No, she just lost someone". About three seconds later the listening in process took over my answering e-mails one so I could decipher that she had, in fact, not misplaced another human being but that rather a person close to her had recently died. 

So that is why. She wasn't mad at me or disgusted by my lack of manners or alternative lifestyle. The rest of my colleagues probably still liked me okay enough. It wasn't distance I had felt, only grief.